Sunday, June 18, 2006

BIGboyhood...littleboyhood...is there a difference?

I am flabbergasted! BoyHood just expanded to include age 37. Yesterday, while driving down the interstate, my (usually) very mature, predictable, collected husband displayed some definite signs of being all boy.

We had just purchased a new vehicle to accommodate our need to mash more car seats into a limited space. Although our new car is several years old, it has some features that we never dreamed about “owning” - such as power sliding doors. Since we (and especially Scott) tend to favor simplicity, we did not pause long to admire this luxury at the point of purchase. It just happened to come with the car. (For those who do not know Scott well, he values simplicity so much that he drinks his coffee “straight” (black without sugar), likes cake best without any icing and thinks his wife most appealing to the senses in the absence of any “additives” such as make-up or perfume.) Great was my surprise (and horror) then when this seemingly insignificant “power-sliding feature” brought out some unmistakable boy-characteristics in Scott.

Cruising at 70 mph he all of a sudden babbled: “I wonder if the sliding doors can open while we drive” and instantly started to look and feel for the “magic button”. It took a firm “NO, we are not going to find out” and “Your sons are watching you” for him to reluctantly give up on the idea. I could not believe it! In my mind any such notion is obviously absurd and waaaaaaay to risky. What made him even think of such a thing? Even if he was not entirely serious and even if his responsible self would have brought him to his sense before acting on the thought - the mere idea seems irrational to me. He in turn could not quite understand my bewilderment. In his mind it was a perfectly sane thing to wonder about and experiment with. He added that he actually often contemplates such things

The journey of raising and living with boys has just taken a turn for the worst. I understand them even less than I initially thought. And a big boy has just been added to my list of “boys to watch”. I have a suspicion that those sliding doors will at some point undergo the proposed “test” regardless. May neither my little boys nor I be present, for I now know enough to predict our reactions to be polar opposites: Mom will be horrified and concerned. The boys, however, will be encouraged in their (lifelong?) pursuit of risk.

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